
"Tiffany, I figure this is as good a time as any to tell you...I'm gay. Also, I just landed my first real acting gig, playing "Peach Pit Dishwasher #3" on Beverly Hills 90210. If I really prove myself, I may be able to move up to the role of "Brandon Walsh's Sideburn Double". You what they say: you gotta suck a lot of....well, you of all people know how to get ahead in this biz."
"Oh, Rick. I knew it all along. But I also have my own Hollywood plans. I just scored a totally awesome role too, playing "Side Ponytail Stand-In" for Kristy Swanson on some movie about a teenage vampire-slayer. Wicked, right? I guess doing all those splits in a cheerleader skirt finally paid off."