Friday, July 25, 2008

Never On Sunday

Early this morning I was driving and thought I'd blown a tire, what with the clackity-thumpity-whappity sounds coming from the general tire area of my car. I was thinking, angrily in my head: "Dammitall! I have no time for this today, KARMA." And did I mention I was wearing a lovely outfit of the pajama sort of yoga pant capris and and old tee shirt I've had since about 1988 with an owl on it that says "just say no to drugs". I'm badASS, watch out. But the problem was that I was wearing no... "support system" underneath, if you catch my drift and immediately I was remembering the whole "don't leave the house without clean underwear" thing that moms everywhere like to say. Or a bra would have been good. Normally I never dirtbag it up like that IN PUBLIC, but I was running super extra late this morning and had to drop someone off somewhere so getting dressed was not an option.

Turns out it was not a blown tire, just a really craptastic road that was in the process of being scraped and gouged so the road worker guys could fix it. But just the thought of me getting out of the car IN THAT SUPERCOOL OUTFIT to call someone to tow it made me realise I will NEVER AGAIN looks like a schlump, sans bra or clean underwear. Unless it's the morning after from a Night Of 1000 Cocktails, then all bets are off and you'll be lucky if I'm wearing matching shoes at that point.

One of my main bitches, Michelle of Dollhouse Bettie has some of the most amazing stock of vintage lingerie you've ever seen, ranging from the 20's on up, with a huge emphasis on the 1940's-1950's pinup thang. She also sells repro pinup stuff in all sizes, right up to 1X, so she's got your back curvy broads. Did I mention she also offers glamorous boudoir photography sessions? But not in the "Hey girlie, you wanna make a quick buck? Take off yer top" kind of way, but in a old Hollywood glamour/ set in a gorgeous turn of the century Edwardian flat with period furnishings" kind of way. She has a real world store in San Francisco, on Haight Street even, because she's rolls like that. If you live anywhere near there stop in and tell her Kim said she's a fancy bitch and would like to get in her panties.

A sample if you will, of undieland:

(yeah, the pics are small but they were the only ones I cold swipe, so deal with it pervs)

She'll make sure you never get caught with lame underwear again. Or at least make sure you're WEARING it.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

eVintage Society's Blog Tag Wednesday. Late As Always.

VINTAGE OR BUST!~Blog Tag Wednesday~ Tropical Tease!
July 23rd, 2008

Its Blog Tag Wednesday at the eVintage Society! Summer is the perfect time to take a holiday to a tropical locale! Meanwhile, wearing Hawaiian and exotic prints in vintage can tide you over til you can afford that plane ticket. Let’s get tropical!

1) Show us your favorite Hawaiian or tropical print in your inventory!

This vintage Malia sundress rules because: A) it's an awesome grass green color that is odd and wonderful and B) heart shaped flowers. I said HEART. SHAPED. FLOWERS.

2)Favorite era for Hawaiian? 40’s exotic gowns, 50s bombshell sarongs, 60s printed shifts or 70’s Hawaiian halter maxis?

Half 40's and half 50's full sundresses. So there.

3)Favorite exotic destination if money were no object?

Money IS no object when you're filthy rich and gorgeous like myself, did you not know that? Not buying it, eh? Damn. Well if I could ever swing it, which I won't, it'd be a whirlwind adventure to Tahiti.

4)Favorite exotic destination on a real-world budget?

The Jersey Shore is exotic, isn't it?

5)Best vacation ever?

Best pre-family trip was living in England for a year. Best after family trip was fancy pants b&b in New England. It was so...New England-y.

Thanks for the tag, Empress Jade Vintage. Back to you eVintage Society.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Where The Boys Are

Today is the little man's birthday and these are his top 2 ultimate birthday wish list items, written exactly as so:

1. "A dog. The weener kind."

Which he *is* getting, the dog of the weener kind, but not for another month yet. Can't be helped, so don't even try the "You're parent of the year, giving a seriously late ass present. For shame with you and your tardy gift-giving" guilt trip, mmkay? I have Italian in-laws so I've built up and immunity to it. Well that, and also not listening when they're talking helps.

2. "Movies for my collection".

'Tis true, the boy loves his cinema. Not in the fat-kid-and-cheetos way, but in the loves-classic-film/art-student way. Praise jebus that's he's getting past the Disney/Pixar/animated swill full of Morals and Lessons. Good thing too, because there's a point one reaches before watching Cars so many times that a cyanide pill with a straight-up Clorox chaser sounds delicious. This one is going to be in movies somehow, either the acting in or directing and/or producing of. This year's birthday list includes The Sandlot (kickASS) and Stand By Me (double kickass) and Angels With Dirty Faces (well the boy's a genius obviously), all of which he's getting. I vow to always dress the boy, for as long as he lets me, like a character from one of the first 2. The boy's uniform is generally a stripey tee, cuffed Levis and hi-top chucks. Although if I could, I'd dress him like one of the The Dead End Kids every day. In fact, I'm gonna work on that.


"Extra! Extra! Read all about it! Kid gets beat up on the playground for looking like a 1930's newsie!"...Might not work so well after all.

The good thing about being the only female type in a house of all male types is that they tend to adore the lone female in the household. Which is me. Adore me! Worship me fools! Bow at my feet lowly peasants! By now I have sole authority on the wardrobing of said males and you know how GIRLS are, so bossy and domineering. That's my job which shall not be shared. Bitches. So I don't think it'd go well if I had a daughter, I'm a total Chick Among Boys. Peeps with daughters~ I'm not sure how you do it. I can't even fathom what life's gonna be like for you when they hit puberty to teenhood and I don't envy you one bit. But when it comes to clothing, especially vintage, girls have the upper hand in Total Cuteness, do they not? Little cardigans over 50's sundresses? LOVE that, kill me now. That's probably the *only* time I wish I had a girl instead of having the World's Coolest 8 Year Old Boy. Don't hate the player, hate the game. Whatever. I hate MYSELF for saying that.

It's no secret that I adore selling boy's to men's vintage (ha ha...Boyz to Men...Get it?...Lame.) For your own little hooligans, check out these things from the 50's, all from me at Fast Eddie's Retro Rags! I know what boys like. They'll like what I tell 'em to like.

2Tone Plaid Gaucho Shirt, for your delinquent-in-training:

NOS loop shirt w/ gold lurex swirls and embroidered arrows:

Salt & pepper flecked wool coat, NOS: