Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Lola (L-o-l-a, Lola)

Once upon a time, in a land called "The 80's", Three Wise Men heralded upon the masses: "Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man." And lo, we were. But is every man crazy 'bout a sharp dressed woman? And do real men wear pink? And are loafers without socks acceptable with a white linen suit? If Crockett and Tubbs go for it, it's good enough for me. All men love a chick in men's clothing. I think the most popular "dancer" at Reverend Ted Haggard's House of Ass-solution wears a pinstriped fedora and tie and comes onstage (not like THAT, pervs) carrying a briefcase. See? Ted Haggard knows a thing or 2 about a thing or 2.

Manly clothing on women has always been hot and I think most men think it's ridiculously hot. Pants?... On a GIRL, you say?! A female?... In the boardroom?! Wearing a SUIT? Why that's just crazy enough to work. Power and status, always good times in my book, not that I've ever had either. But add some femininity and a power suit to make Sigourney Weaver cry and you have pure tnt.

But not in the 80's-Working-Girl-Aqua-Net-Hall-and-Oates-in-the-Beemer-Working-for-the-Weekend-Drinking-Bartles-and-James-while-Jazzercising kind of way. Though that way is sounding awesome and something I feel is my life's mission to go out and do. Minus the Jazzercise. I'm talking women's clothing with a manly edge that says "I'm somebody. Out of the way or bitches get CUT".

"Don't hate me because I wear Reeboks and power walk to my Very Important Phone-Answering Job in The Big City."

Here's a fab vintage 50's Ben Zuckerman pinstriped suit from Susan of North Star Vintage. You KNOW the woman who wore this suit has cut some bitches in her day to get to the top. Now you can too! Joan Crawford approves this message.

Fedora and briefcase sold separately.

And in case you're the sewing type, this not-too-sexual-yet-pants-can-be-sexy vintage 40's pattern from Julie of Sew-Retro Vintage Patterns will do nicely. The gals on the cover KNOW who wears the pants.

Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

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