Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Way-Out Wednesday: Holiday Horrors: Santa's Little (No) Helper

Welcome to a holly, jolly Way-Out Wednesday, Holiday Horrors edition! (FYI: There is no holly. And the "jolly"? Well, that's debatable. Doubtful, even. You've been warned.)

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Clowns are universally grotesque, no question. Scary, creepy and altogether not amusing. But elves on the other hand? They're adorable! Charming! Santa's little helpers! Happy little imps, they are. Or, you know, when they're not.



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At first, you're all: "Aww, what a cute little Vintage Homemade Elf Doll! I want one!" But then upon closer viewing, you'll get a feeling of despair. Like that time you got a little too friendly with the Peppermint Schnapps at the office party and did the "Elaine" dance, only you weren't quirky and ironic, just drunk and slaggy. There's just something so...what's the word...uber depressing about this guy.

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Not evil. Not exactly a creep either. But he sure as hell ain't jolly! Just...wrong. Off. Fakakta. Maybe it's the carrot-like nose. Maybe it's the mis-matched ears. Maybe it's the "Liza with a "Z" makeup. Or maybe it's the pictures?


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Ahh. There we have it.

3 comments:

  1. Ahahahaha I can just imagine him lying there depressed with vomit and pee on his crusty velvet pants.... Poor Pinoccio wannabe...

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  2. Off to the Island of Misfit and Drug Addicted Toys for you!!

    Betty Ford, paging the Betty Ford clinic...

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  3. Sad little elf... Now I'M depressed...

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