Saturday, August 9, 2008

Rock Me Amadeus

Because I am known (if not for my sunny disposition and happy tidings toward mankind) for my intellectually stimulating deep thoughts, I have a few questions weighing heavy on my mind:

1. Does anybody ever really fish a boot out of a river?

2. Do billy goats really eat tin cans?

3. Has anyone ever opened their parachute after jumping out of a plane only to
discover an anvil?

4. Did anyone ever have a grand piano accidentally fall on them while walking down
the sidewalk?

5. Has anyone ever walked out of a bank with a sack full of money with a giant "$"
sign on the outside of the bag?

6. When we die, do our eyes really turn into black X's?

7. Has anyone ever been knocked out and actually see birds flying in a circle
around their head?

8. How come when you eat spinach your biceps don't get huge?

9. Do hillbillies still- if ever- drink moonshine out of a jug with "XXX" written on
the outside?


9b. Do they also sit barefooted, wearing overalls on the front porch and actually
play "Dueling Banjos"?

10. Does anybody else on the planet besides me really, reeeeally want to see Tom
catch and finally get to EAT Jerry, once and for all?


  1. I had a billy goat violently munch on my leather jacket once, I would think that would count somewhat along the line of billy goats trying to eat weird stuff.

  2. Yes indeedy daisy duke, hillbillies do (at least Kentuckers'hillbillies do) sit on their porch and play banjos (not so sure about the dueling banjos part, as I never had the cajones to actually join them in said fun and frolics) and they have been known to wear bib jeans. They DO drink it out of jugs with XXX written on, but they also use old glass apple juice containers, tupperware from the 70's and on the special rare occasion, even an old recycled kerosene container. You know that from I know wherefore I speak, so rock on with your bad self,you keep me in stitches with your barbed and apropos comments on the bizarre and twisted human condition. Proud of you!