Saturday, April 12, 2008

Sweet Little Sixteen

Last night I *finally* got around to renting the newest Harry Potter movie, because I am fully aware of my nerdiness and will raise you one Lord of the Rings trilogy that I am watching on TNT right now even though I own the freaking boxed set, because that is HOW A NERD ROLLS and I am loyal to my geek-status movies. The thing I don't get is how these wizard kids and elves with magic never use their powers for personal gain. What's with the morals and the "do the right thing"-iness? Say WHA, now?! I'd be all OVER those powers. Sure I may save a kitten out of a tree and push a guy out of the way from a falling piano from the 6th floor, but damn you, child bearing hips, damn you straight to hell. Zap! Big hips gone. Electric bill or gas bill- which one to pay THIS month? Zap! Money, money, money, muuuh-naaay! I'd have the power to fly, to read thoughts, to be invisible, to be filthy stinking rich and occasionally use it to be good. But probably not that often.

I'd also use powers to have superawesome memory-- so's I don't have to rely on stinking myspace to tell me when my friends' birthdays are- JULIE AND JEN I'M TALKING TO YOU. So here's a blatant shout-out to my friends whose birthdays I missed because I'm apparently the worst friend ever and am too busy sewing my evil villain suit to remember things that don't include world domination.

You can snatch this vintage 30's coat from Julie at Damn Good Vintage a wicked awesome coat that has an old-timey villain feel to it, like the superbad librarian-in-disguise on old-timey England who will give you a firm scolding for talking too loud, meanwhile she's got a rubber catsuit on underneath for her other PT job as dominatrix. Or whatever.

And I'd also have powers to sew like a FIEND, because I would bang out (I said bang out) stupid awesome ensembles in minutes and never wear the same thing twice (damn you Paris Hilton), like the dress on this vintage 40's pattern from Jen at MomsPatterns. I'd ixnay the boob pockets, and make the hip pockets extra big. Where else will my flask and laser gun go?

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