It's The End Of The World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

Today marks a monumental day in history, for 'tis when yours truly blessed the planet with my presence. You're welcome. Today I'm celebrating- (not so much celebrating as mourning, really) my 29th birthday. For the 3rd year in a row. I know I should feel older and act older and have like, maturity or some stupid shit that comes with age, yet...I don't. Screw you, Father Time. I'm never acting my age, so there. That'll learn ya.

This arrived today, all fall color-y and whatnot and smells remarkably wonderful. At least, in comparison to the odors that normally are found in a house full of gross boys.

Flowers? Check.



Cake? Check. DUDES. Dig this crazy cake my Very Important sister had delivered to my door. It's so cool! Why, you ask?...



Fondant DICE, mofo's!



But what better way to turn a year older than to buy yourself something great. Maybe not great, but fun. Not so much fun, really, as ridiculous. Yep, that's it, ridiculous.



That's right. I bought myself a "Shut Up, Hippies" tee shirt. Usually, I find people who wear "funny sayings" tee shirt to be GIANT douches. Like the disgusting college losers in "Imagine Whirled Peas" shirts or cornhole jocks in "MILF Hunter" shirts. But a hateful-to-hippie shirt is EXACTLY what this world needs more of.