Way-Out Wednesday: Keep Your Handerpants To Yourself.

Welcome to an especially way-out Way-Out Wednesday...that's also especially late!





Today's pick for Way-Out Wednesday isn't vintage (don't kill me!) and it can't be found from my artsy homegirls on Etsy (say whaa?!) and it's not creepy (I'm sorry, already!), but it IS fug as hell (win!) and so nerdy that not even ironic Hipsters will find them ironically cool in their ironic un-cool nerdiness. And you know I love me some weird & fug crap that's uncool. So that's really saying something.


I present to you:




Handerpants.




No, seriously.



Fingerless gloves (Madonna style!) that look like men's underwear. "Tighty whities" if you're from these parts. "Y-Fronts" if you're of the British variety. "Stupid as hell" no matter what planet you're from.



Seriously.



Should you feel the need to get your ass kicked on a daily basis, you can get your filthy paws on them from the o-fficial website at www.handerpants.com. And then don't ever talk to me again. Or else. Or else what? Or else I swear I'll figure out a way to give you an atomic wedgie while wearing your Handerpants, that's what.

Atomic Tuesday: Not-So-Ugly Mug

Welcome to Atomic Tuesday, my pretties!




Today's atomic pick-o-goodness is this kickass-tacular Vintage Set of 4 Fire King Blue Heaven Mugs, currently available from Etsy seller Sirkus:

Happy Easter! Happy Spring! Happy Whateverthehell!

Wishing you all a Happy Easter and/or a marvelously gorgeous spring day! Our regular blog features will get back to a regular schedule tomorrow, after taking a lovely break from technology over the past few days. In the meantime, enjoy some pictures from the 1940's-50's of Easters past!

(Also, I just noticed they're all about eggs. What the?! Unintentional, that. Or is it?! Mwuahahahaha! Yeah, no, it's unintentional. Just thought you could use the drama of mad scientist laughter. Carry on.)

Way-Out Wednesday: Giving The Finger.

Welcome to a very special (read: not so much "special" as terrifying) Way-Out Wednesday!




What's creepy as hell and somehow marvelous at the same time? This creepy/marvelous Vintage Plastic Display Finger:







Seriously.


It's like Willy Wonka and a Clockwork Orange met, fell in love and had a baby.


You stick it to the wall and hang stuff from the finger.




Seriously.

Atomic Tuesday: Shaken. And Stirred.

Welcome to Atomic Tuesday!




You know, I haven't shopped on ebay in about a year. I lost all interest in the place after one too many craptastic purchases from one too many even more craptastic sellers. Plus, the constant "improvements" to the site made me so frustrated and stabby that I ended up turning all my affection to either vintage websites of sellers I know and trust, or to Etsy, where I enjoy the artistic vibe of the place. (Granted, Etsy's no angel either and has it's fair share of problems, glitches and pains-in-the-asses.) Maybe it's just me and I'm a cynical grumpy jerk, but ebay's become my red-headed stepchild. You know, "I don't hate you, but I don't really like you either. Life was simpler when you weren't in it and sometimes I get drunk and yell at you, so I'm sorry about that. Most of the time I regret yelling at you, except for all those times I don't.")

Lucky for me, I happened to catch wind of today's vintage pick from the seller herself! Damn lucky too, or else I never would've found these 4 Yards of Vintage 50's Atomic Boomerang Fabric, currently at auction on ebay (with 2 more days to go) from seller Specialsomethings. It's on my watch list, but I have a feeling it's gonna skyrocket out of my price range (which is generally about 7 dollars and 42 cents.)


Behold:




Boomerangs! Atomic starbursts! Classic color, classic print, and it's vintage! It's a trifecta of vintage fabric perfection. (Or something.) You can make an awful lot of beer bottle cozies with 4 yards! (What? No one makes beer bottle cozies anymore? Pity. Another lost art.) The print reminds me of a martini with onions and olives, somehow. Am I crazy? (Answer that and pay the price.)




See? I bet you get a martini vibe now too, right?! (No? Oh, OK. I'm the crazy one, then.)

Heart-Shaped Fox

This is not something I normally write about, but after watching the Fantastic Mr. Fox, I feel the need to have an unsolicited movie review today, given the movie's retro-inspired moments and sarcastic humor- 2 things we do very well around here. No spoilers, so no worries. Hell, it's not even a proper movie review. More like me telling you why you'll like it.

For reasons I can't remember, we totally missed seeing the Fantastic Mr. Fox when it was in theaters. Perhaps my inner psyche purposely made me miss it, because honestly I thought the movie looked ho-hum. So the very 1st day the movie came to Netflix last week, I jumped on it. Turns out, it was a swank and cool unexpected surprise of a movie.



The first 5 minutes of the movie shows Mr. Fox listening to “The Ballad of Davy Crockett” on his radio, and I was instantly hooked. And then there's the thievery and the one-liners and the monotone, dry delivery of jokes and the obscure movie references that only adults would understand (ie: the line from Rebel Without a Cause and the greaser rat who carries a switchblade and dances a scene from West Side Story). Plus, there's the George Clooney. Oh, the dreamy George Clooney. (How is possible that he can make a cartoon animal hot by just lending his voice?! Damn.) It was like Ocean's Eleven for kids with stop-motion claymation, backed by an even more unexpected, retro soundtrack by Wes Anderson which includes Burl Ives, the Rolling Stones, The Beach Boys and Bobby Fuller Four. Pretty smart way of sneaking in a little music appreciate for kids! But even if you're void of ankle-biters in the household, I think adults can easily sit down and watch it and I guarantee you'll appreciate the plot, the music, and the Clooney.

Prints Charming Sunday: Son Of A Gun, We'll Have Big Fun On The Bayou!

Today's vintage pick for Prints Charming Sunday is this "hot damn, I'd sell my firstborn for this slice-o-awesomeness" Vintage 50's Fish Novelty Print Dress & Bolero, available from Etsy seller The Tambourine Drum (And PS: for you Euro types- the seller is located in England, so don't say I never keep you guys in mind!):




Holy ---- ! I'm speechless!



Except:



A.) It's strapless!

B.) It has a matching bolero!

C.) It's a decent size!

D.) It's got a fishy print!

E.) It's real 50's vintage!

F.) I have Hank Williams' "Jambalaya" stuck in my head now!