eVintage Society's Blog Tag Wednesday~ On Thursday!

Because I love keeping you on the edge of your seats waiting for my next earth-moving blog entry chock full of wisdom and deep thoughts by Jack Handey--(but mostly because I'm lazy-making lately and just reeally behind). Notice the extra "e" in "really"? That shows you how much I MEAN IT.

So. I'm posting the eVintage Society's Blog Tag Wednesday on thurdsay and yeah I know the day is almost over. So sue me.

I've been tagged by Empress Jade Vintage!

HAUTE HALTER!
Temperatures are rising and its time to show some skin! The halter neckline is a great way to leave a little to the imagination while exposing enough to stay cool and stylish. Lets talk halters!

1) Show us your favorite halter dress or top in your inventory:
It's a halter! It's 50's! It's boned! It's a full circle! It's a Suzy Perette!



2)Marilyn rocked the halter bodice back in the 50s, but it came back big in the 70's...which is your favorite era for the halter?

For everyday wearin' then 50's. But for fancy, I've seen some damn fine 40's halter gowns that I'd maim for.

3)Bare backs are vulnerable, what’s your suggestion for protecting skin from the sun?

How about not going into it?! I go from snow white to lobster in 5 minutes so sunning is not an option for moi. Plus there's the whole skin cancer thing which I've heard is bad news.

4)Halter as top or dress, whats your preference?

Dress!

5)A bra can be a challenge…..best suggestion for support?

I was gonna be a classy broad and say "duct tape", but decided to take the high road. Damn, I guess that's out.

Back to you, eVintage Society. See you next thursday. Ok, wednesday.

Born Under A Bad Sign

Is it true that people can be born unlucky? I think I may have been, as my life seems sprinkled with Charlie Brownian moments for as long as I can remember. Maybe karma knew before I was even a thought in my parent's hippie heads that I'd enter this world an already-seasoned jaded pessimist and added insult to injury by making me a Scorpio. Jebus, why you gotta play me like that? Astrology-Online says this:

"Scorpios are the most intense, profound, powerful characters in the zodiac. Even when they appear self-controlled and calm there is a seething intensity of emotional energy under the placid exterior. They are like the volcano not far under the surface of a calm sea, it may burst into eruption at any moment."

Does that not sound terrifically filthy and borderline "Danielle Steele opening line"?

This weekend the Small Fry marched in his very first parade for the Cub Scouts, which for most people would a non-issue kind of a day but like any show on any day of the week on Univision, the day was full of Drama! Passion! Suspense! Betrayal! Except without the drama, passion, suspense or betrayal. The button thingy on my flip flop did break though, sending my foot overboard, followed by a string of curse words, making the Ball and Chain embarrassed because I happened to be near a group of Vietnam Vets, which we all know are avid broken flip flop cursers, so what's the big deal I say? And I hate feet, I hate looking at feet and I hate flip flops, mostly because I am inept at walking in them correctly. I never wear them in public much, except of course when I wear curlers, Biore pore strips and house coat to go grocery shopping- as if THAT'S ever a faux pas. But on this day I wore them and there was Tragedy on Main Street, which wouldn't have even happened except we were running late and had to sprint briskly to get a good view and I don't sprint or do ANYTHING briskly and it was ALL HIS FAULT as everything usually is.

The second incident in the day of a series of unfortunate events was losing my camera batteries when they decided to make a break for it and head for the border AKA the sewer grate, never to be heard from again. Who needs pictures of their child's First Major Cub Scout Event, anyway?

I used to surround myself with good-luck charms to ward off the Evil Eye or whatever kind of hoodoo they're supposed to do and carry a rabbit's foot for good luck, which did nothing but get dried out and shed everywhere and then I'm pretty sure my dog might have eaten it at some point. (Should they not do that?) Shout-out to my peeps at PETA! But don't worry Pam Anderson as I know you're reading this, I ate the rest of the rabbit first before using it's paw for a keychain and fashioning a toaster cozy out of it's fur. Did I mention the elaborate shampoo and mascara tests I used on him? So it all worked out in the end, though I'm still unlucky but still luckier than that rabbit.

Need to get lucky? (of COURSE I went there). Then perhaps you should take a gamble on this vintage 50's rayon blouse from Fast Eddie's Retro Rags-it has painted good luck charm figures on them! Getting lucky not included.



I won't even mention the power of rhinestones. THE RHINESTONES. But I'm not even gonna mention it.



Did I mention THE RHINESTONES?

For Those About To Rock (We Salute You)

My friends AC/DC couldn't have said it any better. It's Memorial Day again, and a sad one at that. Our veterans and current military just don't get the props they've earned and deserve~ 99.9% of them are not the torturous, raping and pillaging testosterone-driven scumbags the media wants us to believe, but that .1% gets the media attention and somehow stereotype what ALL military personnel are like. Contrary to popular belief, they don't want to be overseas at war and away from their families and normal lives any more than we want to go to our next ob/gyn appointment.

Know an old-timey veteran in your family? Ask them about their experiences, they love that. Know someone currently involved in the military? Give them a high five, buy them a cup of coffee, tell them THANK YOU because jebus knows our own government doesn't.

All politics aside, just remember when you're down and out in Beverly Hills, their lives are a whole lot worse than yours can ever be.

On a lighter note, enjoy some old-timey ads from 1943 and 1944 during WW11. And Happy Memorial Day, dammit!

Beyond The Sea

I'm not one to get sentimental...or even show any emotions for that matter (besides bitchy) because I am half robot and all, but at the risk of sounding like a stupid girl, this weekend marks a neat-o landmark in time for me. This Memorial Day weekend will have been exactly 10 years since The Ball and Chain proposed in a not-very-dramatic-or-romantic-or-even-clever way. Roses, candlelit dinner and horse-drawn carriage ride? Fools. I'm a lucky gal, I get proposed to all casual-like after playing pool. PLAYING POOL, which is far from what dreams are made of.

Our Big Moments In Life have luckily always been captured on film, such as the very first second we met a friend of ours happened to take a picture of us at that split second, and how many people can say they have a picture of the second they met their very own ball and chain? And this picture, taken a minute before he finished playing this game, after which he set the cue down and asked me to marry him.



The man redeemed himself by giving me the coolest vintage ring set I ever laid eyes on and that did in fact make me shed a tear or 2, which is odd because robots don't cry. It went exactly like this, said in a tone like he was asking me if I wanted the last Coke from the fridge:

Ball and Chain: "So whaddya think, wanna get married?"
Me: "Umm, OK."

Here's the serendipitous part. I love serendipity! I also love Serendipity starring John Cusack! Just this morning I was flipping through a bunch of old Better Homes and Gardens and Vogue magazines from the 40's and 50's learning how to build a better bomb shelter and 100 Ways to Use Spam. Reading old magazines is what I do quite a bit when the computer is having a seizure and not functioning and reading a real book is too much of a commitment.

Lo and behold, I found the 1947 ad in Time magazine for my wedding ring set. My rings are bit different than the 4 pictured, but mine are Keepsake, and don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, my diamonds are smaller, which of course figures because why would I ever in my lifetime get huge diamonds? But is that not an amazing amazement? Are you perplexed and mystified as well? And on the same weekend I get proposed to exactly 10 years ago?! Coincidence? Government plot? The world may never know.



Behold!



Shazam! My glorious finger!



I love it when a plan comes together.

We Are The Champions

LuLu's Vintage held a People's Choice Award for "Lulu's 2008 People's Choice for Best Vintage Websites"~ and Fast Eddie's Retro Rags was voted 9! I'm not last, get a load of THAT. Shocking but not surprising, because I do kinda rock your faces off, don't I? Seriously, what an HONOR to have peeps vote for me, I'm so grateful and thankful. Thanks for recognizing my awesome power of awesomeness.

It's also cool to see 2 of my close bitches on the list, too (Ang and Julie, I'm looking in your general direction)...

And the winners are...

Dorothea's Closet Vintage (I KNEW you'd be there, girl!)
Sweet Cherry Vintage
Dandelion Vintage
Vintage-a-Peel
Denisebrain
Daisy Fairbanks
Damn Good Vintage (Damn straight!)
Vintage Secret
Fast Eddie's Retro Rags (Awwwww,yeaaahh)
Sydneys Vintage Clothing


Next stop, world domination.

Who Do You Love?

A girl can only bitch about things for so long before she needs a break and also I'm afraid karma will send me an email that says "I'm gonna git you, sucka" and perhaps it's time to write about something that doesn't make me crabby and make a list of things I actually like. I'm only one person, people. But tomorrow I'll probably be back true to form complaining about kids these days and their crazy jazz records, so no worries.

So now, a quick list of useless and garbagey things I love that I wish I invented, had my flux capacitor not been stolen and the DeLorean not in the shop.

1.) The Ex Voodoo Knife Holder.

So I got lucky (I said "I got lucky") and missed out on a past full of psycho ex boyfriends that need a voodoo pox placed upon them- but- I do have a past full of random guys that wouldn't be too bad off if they were set on fire or maimed just a little.



2.) Big Mouth Billy Bass.

I wish I was more redneckier and hillbillier so that hanging this above my mantle would be apropos, but we can't all be born lucky.



3.) Beer Drinking Hat.

You'd think I'd have a little more class than to want to wear this to all the football games I never go to. But I don't.



4.) The Gem Sweater Schtick.

WHY didn't I think of this? This kind of white trashy goodness is wonderful. Leslie is a marketing genius, collecting the goodness of white trashy 80's gem sweaters and turning them into an empire, complete with a Gem Sweater Museum, website and music videos. And she wears gold spandex. GOLD. SPANDEX.



We may have been separated at birth.

The Politics Of Dancing

May I rant for a moment please? And by rant I mean bitch mercilessly? I kinda figured you wouldn't mind.

Girls can be so funny. And by funny I mean catty bitches. It's amusing in the vintage community the one-upmanship that happens when it comes to certain things, but in this case, the topic of Who Loves Novelty Prints The Best. Though I'm not speaking of any one person in particular but rather in general because generalizations are fun, I'm really quite over those kinds of people demanding we better recognise *they* love novelty prints the best, that *they* have loved them "x" amount of time more than the next guy, that *they* collect the most...yes, we recognise. And also, bo-ring. Remember, my Uber Cool Darlings, every 5 minutes there's someone else better looking, better dressed and all around better than you to take your place.

We get it already. You're a super awesome fantastic happy fun time vintage seller who's way cooler than everyone else and always was and always will be the end. Duly noted. Can't we all just like the same things and not have to worry about who's the winner of the Cool Game? It's safe to say if you sell vintage, you love wacky novelty prints just as much as everyone else. Dude, it's part of the JOB DESCRIPTION. Vintage= quirky, weird prints and you can't really be a hardcore vintage seller if you DON'T love them, therefore you're really no more special than anyone else, see? Now that we've got that cleared up, sucker punches all around! Yay!

Me? I could give a rat's ass how 50's your house is (not as much as mine), what you sell (the coolest vintage clothing anywhere), how cool you are (nowhere near the Coolness Level that I have achieved) or how vintage you dress (like, Every. Day. Duh.) Nah, I've found the best people to hang with are the ones who don't feel the need to remind you that they hung out with the Polecats in the 80's when rockabilly meant something and it's so commercial and played out now. (Which it IS, but that's neither here nor there nor relevant to my general bitching. Moving on.)

So I'm selling a great novelty print at the current moment, not because I'm cool but because the fabric is. It's a repro, but what a reasonable facsimile! 60's Dance Crazy bark cloth with swingin' chicks dancing the Twist and the Slop. (Which sounds disgusting and of course I'm dying to see what the Slop actually LOOKS like, I'm thinking slightly pornographic). And the band is called the Bristol Stompers! Which would make a great name for a psychobilly band from the UK. Maybe there already is one, thus proving how uncool I really am.

A pretty hard (I said pretty hard) to come by print these days, being out of production (or so I'm told). Available at auction NOW at Fast Eddie's Retro Rags.

Because we ALL love a good print, let's do some enjoying of the goings-on here, shall we my pets?: